7 things you need to live better

After decades of study in the positive psychology field, US psychologists Christopher Peterson and Martin Seligman came up with 24 character traits that every person needs to acquire in order to live their happiest, most fulfilling and successful life.

We whittled this list down to the seven we think are absolute must-haves to live your best life ever — and who doesn't want that?

1. Grit

It's that sheer determination that keeps you persevering at goals, even in the face of challenges.

You need it because... Life has a tendency to throw big fat obstacles your way, just when you thought you had it all under control.

Psychologist Dr Lissa Johnson says that having resilience, or grit, "allows us to deal with daily hassles, as well as major upheavals, without being destabilised".

Get more by... Knowing exactly what you want and holding out for it. "Grit takes courage and self-belief," explains psychologist Dr Joann Lukins. "An important component of this is goal-setting. If you have a clear idea of the things you wish to achieve in life, it makes sticking it out much easier."

2. Self-control

The ability to rein yourself in and know when to say "no".

You need it because... "It prevents irrational behaviour that often leads to conflict," says clinical psychologist Aleks Srbinoski. "Self-control reduces impulsivity and allows you to be more effective in relationships."

Get more by... Practising. "Self-control is like a muscle," says Dr Lukins. "The more you exercise it, the bigger and better it gets." It may be hard at first, but with time it'll become second nature.

3. Curiosity

Be open-minded, willing to learn and keen to discover things about yourself and your world.

You need it because... You'd be mentally stumped without it. "Curiosity is a wonderful strength, as it opens us up to new possibilities and challenges," says Dr Lukins. "Being curious expands what we see and our potential for growth. It will make you more productive, more positive and you will learn more overall."

Get more by... "Seeking out novel experiences and challenges," advises Srbinoski. "Pick up a new instrument, learn a new language, visit new people and ask more questions." Think of your body and brain as never-ending receptacles for new information and experiences and endeavour to top them up a little each day.

4. Love

It's what makes the world go round!

You need it because... "Love is one of the key strengths associated with wellbeing and life satisfaction," explains counsellor Alex Kingsmill. "An ability to love facilitates enduring interpersonal connections, which boost feelings of safety and allow you to make decisions and achieve goals."

Get more by... Giving it. "Practise your ability to love and be loved," advises Kingsmill. "Offer a sincere compliment and watch what happens. Do something for someone you love that will make them happy. Get creative."

5. Optimism

The natural inclination to assume that good — not bad — things are going to come to you.

You need it because... It's the one thing that's guaranteed to improve your quality of life. "An optimistic person is happier, more resilient, more confident and more effective," says psychotherapist Jim O'Connor. "Optimism generates virtuous cycles that lead to better outcomes."

Get more by... Using mind over matter. "If something bad happens, find a more helpful way to think about it," advises Dr Lukins. O'Connor suggests that you recognise how limiting pessimism is and how empowering positivity can be.

6. Gratitude

Be thankful for all the good in your life.

You need it because... It makes you feel happy to be alive. "Gratitude is vital — it's a key predictor of happiness," says Dr Lukins. "Reflecting upon things we appreciate is an excellent strategy for general feelings of wellbeing, enhanced relationships and greater satisfaction."

Get more by... Noticing the little things and taking time to appreciate them. "Write down three things you are grateful for every day for three weeks," says Srbinoski. Not sure where to start? How about that coffee that got you through this morning?

7. Zest

Approach life with all the enthusiasm and energy of a five-year-old with a mouthful of lollies.

You need it because... "When you wholeheartedly embrace life, you are left with more energy, excitement and appreciation," explains Dr Lukins. The best part is, the more zest you have, the more you'll develop. "To feel good, we need to move — the more we move, the better we feel," confirms Srbinoski.

Get more by... Getting out there! "Physical activity is great for increasing zest," suggests Dr Lukins. "You can also think of something exciting that you haven't done before and plan to make it happen. Spend time with people who make you laugh, get enough rest, eat well and restrict caffeine late at night." And have some lollies, if you must.

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