Vast majority of victims know, trust their abusers – Times Herald

Marist College psychology professor Dr. Linda Dunlap participated in a live chat in conjunction with the Times Herald-Record on Tuesday night on keeping your children safe from sexual predators.

Here are some excerpts from the chat:

For starters, Dr. Dunlap, how concerned should we be about the prospect of sexual predators working in and around our children? Do you have any statistics that can illustrate?

* 90 percent of all childhood sexual abuse occurs by someone with whom the child knows and has a trusted, established relationship, not by a stranger.

* According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, statistics show that 1 in 5 girls and 1 in 10 boys are sexually exploited before they reach adulthood, yet less than 35 percent of those assaults are reported to the authorities.

* Childhood sexual abuse occurs among ALL socioeconomic, educational, racial, and cultural groups in the United States and in the world.

* Most sexual assaults are committed by someone of the same race as their victim.

* The most vulnerable age for sexual abuse is between 7 and 13 years. The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children reports that 84 percent of sexually abused children are victimized before the age of 12.

* In the majority of cases of childhood sexual abuse, most predators gain access to their victims by enticement and deception, seldom by using force.

* Sex offenders pose one of the highest risks for re-offending after being released from custody.

What are the signs we should be looking for in our children that may tell us they could be currently preyed upon by a predator?

Possible Red Flags include:

* Someone who repeatedly ignores social, emotional, or physical boundaries or limits.

* Someone who refuses to let a child set any of his or her own limits.

* Someone who insists on hugging, touching, kissing, tickling, wrestling with or holding a child even when the child does not want this physical contact or attention.

* Someone who shares inappropriate personal or private information with a child, that should normally by shared with adults only.

* Someone who frequently points out sexual images or tells inappropriate, suggestive stories or jokes with children present.

* Someone who seems overly interested in the sexuality of a particular child or teen, and talks repeatedly about the child's developing body.

* Someone who insists upon or manages to spend uninterrupted time alone with a child.

* Someone who appears to be "too good to be true", frequently offering to baby sit different children for free; taking children on special outings alone; often buying children gifts or giving them money for no apparent reason.

I'm 46. When I was a kid, I never heard anything about sexual predators. What's happened?

They were there. Media gets us news about them to us instantly (now). Children were not educated to speak out and adults were not educated to know the signs. We are making some positive head ways in helping protect children.

Remember also that we used to not know that smoking while pregnant was a problem.

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