Top Five Guidelines for End of Year Reflection

End of year for most people is one of mental and physical organization, as we put away new gifts, jettison unwanted ones, and prepare to close our books and ready for tax season.

Emotionally it is a lot more complex. Monsters and Critics spoke to Dr. David Reiss, MD, a practicing psychiatrist for 25 years, who specializes in front-line adult and adolescent psychiatric care, about this reflective time of year.

Emotionally it is a lot more complex. Monsters and Critics spoke to Dr. David Reiss, MD, a practicing psychiatrist for 25 years, who specializes in “front-line” adult and adolescent psychiatric care, about this reflective time of year.

Emotionally it is a lot more complex. Monsters and Critics spoke to Dr. David Reiss, MD, a practicing psychiatrist for 25 years, who specializes in “front-line” adult and adolescent psychiatric care, about this reflective time of year.

Dr. Reiss specializes in adult psychiatry, with a sub-specialty in Borderline Disorders and is recognized internationally for expertise in character and personality dynamics, having performed more than 10,000 psychiatric evaluations; evaluated and treated patients from diverse social and cultural backgrounds, from every occupational field. He is currently the Interim Medical Director of Providence Behavioral Health Hospital in Holyoke, MA.

His expertise includes personality traits/dynamics: real/fictional characters, social and political events (non-partisan), major / high profile criminal cases, medication, bullying (cyber, school, etc.), self-destructive acts / suicides, relationship issues, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, drug / alcohol / gambling abuse and more. He is a frequently invited lecturer and has contributed to numerous publications in academic journals and newsletters on understanding the significance of character and personality traits in regards to business organizations, personal development, medical and mental health treatment, socio-political systems, and sports / entertainment industries.

In additional his expertise with regard to what one would consider to be the “typical” purview of a psychiatrist, Dr. Reiss is an expert on the psychological aspects of the political process and political issues, focusing on the Psychology of different forms of government and leadership qualities (in general, non-partisan - leaders vs. followers;  psychology of democracy versus totalitarian political perspectives); Psychology of how people decide to vote; Psychology of political advertisements; Group psychology as it pertains to political groups (in general, non-partisan) and Psychology of political activity vs. passivity.

Dr. Reiss is also a student of professional wrestling, since childhood, guided by his father, an amateur boxer, wrestler and stage hypnotist. 

He has done extensive work, published articles and given seminars on the psychology of ring action, with a focus on understanding the deeper psychosocial significance of ring characters and “storylines” and the emotional reaction of fans to the spectacle of Professional Wrestling.

Dr. Reiss's five "tips" for the holidays:

Relax

If you have any time off, schedule in some time to relax, doing something you enjoy - whether with friends or family or by yourself.  Take a break not only from work, but from "the holidays" by doing something that is relaxing and stress-free.

Perspective

Holidays will bring up memories - good and bad.  That is unavoidable.  Do not fall into the trap of feeling guilty or "wrong" if you find yourself experiencing negative or uncomfortable emotions.  Try not to get mired in negativity, but acknowledge the reality of mixed or negative feelings, "look them in the eye" and then move on.   As a zen saying goes regarding negative emotions, "Treat them as unwelcome guest.  Invite them in. Offer a cup of tea. Ask them to leave."

Be Kind

For the sake of family harmony, there may be times you have to "put on an act" - that is, act in a polite and civil manner to persons you may not care for.  No need to feel guilty or ashamed.  You don't have to go beyond civility and proclaim a closeness that does not exist.  Acknowledge to yourself your deeper feelings and feel comfortable that you are doing the correct thing by acting politely to "maintain the peace."  It's not the time to bring up old "issues" and if others do, politely defer, "Let's find a better time that we can discuss that."  Do not expect that everyone else will play by that rule, but try to stand to your ground that it is not the correct place or time to bring up old issues (unless mutually agreed upon in a constructive manner).

Take Stock

The end of the year is a natural time to take stock of where you are, where you have been and where you want your life to head.  Again, understand that there will be mixed feelings - excitement, hope, pride, regret, sadness, fear - and accept all of them as an inherent part of life, while looking ahead with the idea of making improvements.  At the same time, keep your goals realistic as to the extent that changes can be made and the time frame in which changes can be made.  It's fine to make "New Year's Resolutions" as a reminder of what you want to accomplish - but do not expect Resolutions to give you motivation (or skills) you do not already have.  Keep in mind that unless your are making major changes in your life (which should be thought through carefully), no matter how much you want to change situations, the stage and the cast of characters will remain the same, and roadblocks will not suddenly disappear with the coming of the New Year.

Secret Santa

Do something for anonymous others, anonymously.  It does not have to be "big" or an issue of severe self-sacrifice.  Find a reasonable way to offer someone, somewhere, some assistance anonymously and without fanfare.  Whether it is contributing time through a religious or social organization, or just donating a few dollars, a small gesture can help you to feel more grounded and connected to the spirit of the Holidays, regardless of your particular religious beliefs or practices.

www.DMRDynamics.com

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