In a recent article about the lack of contemporary Christmas standards, Slate damned Lady Gaga’s attempt at spreading Christmas cheer, 2008’s Christmas Tree, with the faint praise “at least it’s not a cover of Santa Baby.” The holiday staple, writen by Joan Ellen Javitz and made famous by Catwoman Eartha Kitt, is number 25 on the list of most-played Christmas songs, and may well be higher on the list of most officially released covers: the latest, from Nickelodeon star Ariana Grande, joins the likes of Madonna, Taylor Swift, Mae West, Miss Piggy and RuPaul in making our holidays a little more commercially crass and sexually uncomfortable. The National Post’s David Berry figures out just how crass and uncomfortable in this holiday edition of Pop Psychology.

Reading suggestion: Listen to Santa Baby below, then scroll down to follow along with the lyrics.