STOCKBRIDGE -- A prominent Berkshire County psychologist believes too many young men have become so immersed in online activities that their ability to form relationships and develop careers has been jeopardized.
Jonathan Aronoff, a Stockbridge native whose forthcoming book is titled "The Lost Generation of Boys," will detail the problem and propose some solutions this Sunday at the Stockbridge Library’s monthly Speaker Series. The 4 p.m. talk is free and will include questions from the audience.
Aronoff, a licensed psychologist, board-certified psychoanalyst and life coach, works extensively with young men in his Stockbridge-based private practice.
About 10 years ago, he told The Eagle, he began receiving calls about young adults, "not troubled kids but good students and athletes, with other skills such as music."
"I was surprised about the complaints from parents that these young men lacked desire, motivation and anxiety about taking charge of their lives," he said. "They were willing to live at home and not worry about or focus on their careers."
Upon further investigation, Aronoff discovered that "they were soothing themselves, defaulting to a lifestyle that involved computers and technology. My generation wouldn’t have been caught dead living at home, it would have violated the cultural code unless you were working in a family business or on a farm."
What he described as the "man-boy syndrome" reflects "the current generation who appear to be derailed from the traditional role and genetic underpinning as hunters, trappers, builders, providers, protectors, warriors and procreators."
He also cited their difficulty in forming intimate relationships, "to step up to be a mature human being and raise a family or be a partner."
Aronoff argued that "the more they’re stimulated by technology, the more they want it, an almost-addictive, compulsive seeking for stimulation. The rest of the world becomes boring."
As a result, he contended, creativity is stifled -- "a sense of exploration is missing. They don’t have the patience as they jump from cellphones to computer games, Facebook, FaceTime, Skype and iPads."
Aronoff advocates a focus on physical and psychological health through family and social relationships, education and work leading to a career, financial success and community involvement.
"Parents have to reclaim the right to deny and set limits from the get-go Što simply say no and mean it," he declared. "You have to find a way to help a kid adapt to the world as it’s evolving. Parenting is critical, you have to put limits and controls on what goes on in the home. You have to engage in the fight."
Aronoff’s prescription for young men includes respect for older generations and the structure of a family, classroom or athletic team. "You’re not an equal, you have to earn the right," he said.
"By high school, everyone has to have some rules in place," he said. "Parents need to get them involved in giving to the community."
Aronoff, 60, has lectured on "The Lost Generation of Boys" at recent meetings of the American Psychological Association and the International Symposium and Summit on Violence, Abuse, and Trauma held in San Diego, Calif.
A 1971 Monument Mountain Regional High School graduate, he has degrees from Hampshire College, Ohio University and the California School of Professional Psychology. His doctorate in clinical psychology is from Brigham Young University.
He has worked at the Austen Riggs Center, a leading Stockbridge psychiatric facility, and opened his private practice in town 20 years ago. Aronoff is a certified fitness trainer, has helped train high school and college athletes, and was head coach for the Monument Mountain High School’s girls soccer team from 1998 through 2002.
To contact Clarence Fanto:
cfanto@yahoo.com
or (413) 637-2551.
On Twitter: @BE_cfanto