Can a 10-year-old deep-breathe her way into stress-control? Apparently so, according to a new program developed by the Psychology Foundation of Canada in partnership with drug giant Pfizer.

Through their community partnership (see morethanmedication.ca), the pharmaceutical company, whose product list includes everything from anti-anxiety and cholesterol-lowering medications to that famous little blue pill for men, has made available a free teachers’ and parents’ resource called Stress Lessons.

Some parents, up to their ears in alligators, may find it hard to believe their kids are also coping with stress. But their days can be as frantic as ours as they juggle homework with after-school lessons and sports while coping with other issues, whether it’s bullying or a sibling’s illness or the ripple effect of their parents’ divorce.

In Canada, one out of every five kids shows signs of an emotional or behavioural problem.

Thornhill, Ont. psychologist Dr. Robin Alter says children, like adults, need some stress in their lives to get them moving and to motivate them to be their best. Just like a guitar string needs to have the right amount of stress or tension to make music, we all need just the right amount of stress to perform well and feel good, says Alter, the author of Anxiety and the Gift of Imagination.

“You have to fine-tune stress. If it’s too tight, it’s going to break. When that happens, you are overwhelmed. Your body is thrown off balance and the stress hormones kick in. Our stress response is about fight or flight and we realize that kids react not only physiologically to things that actually happen but also to what they might be anticipating as stressful – like a test, for example.”

Short-term stresses such as having to cope with a new classroom or moving to a new neighbourhood are bumpy periods that most families prepare themselves for. But when these or other stressors seem to take over a child’s life, it’s time for a parent to be even more attentive and possibly seek help.

According to the psychologyfoundation.org, research shows that a strong and healthy parent-child relationship is the key to raising resilient, productive and mentally healthy kids.

This new Stress Lessons program offers health information, activities, conversation starters and videos that teachers and parents can use to introduce stress management strategies such as deep breathing relaxation to kids in Grades 4 through 6. Even young kids can be taught how concentrating on their breath sends a powerful message to their brain to calm down during stressful times.

Learning about stress is a powerful lesson, says Dr. Alter who believes that parents and teachers need to lead the way and either model or teach kids life-long stress management skills. One thing parents can do is build de-stressing activities into the family’s routine.

“For example, it helps if parents say something like, ‘It’s been a tough day. Let’s all take a break and play ping pong.

“Stress is such a normal everyday thing. The better we deal with it the healthier we’ll be and the bigger and richer our lives will be. If you want to have an interesting life, it’s important to learn to deal with stress.”

Is it stress?

Kids won’t always tell you if they’re stressed out, so look for the following signs: Whining, poor listening, mood swings, acting out, crying, nail biting, day dreaming, fighting with friends and family, poor school performance or concentration, difficulty problem-solving, physical issues like headaches.

Worry later!

One of the suggestions made by Stress Lessons is a family worry box: Decorate and personalize an old shoebox and encourage everyone to write down their worries and fears and place them in the box anytime they are feeling stressed.

Stress is catching!

Parents can transfer stress to their families, says Dr. Alter who gives this example: A mom, stressed by heavy traffic, yells at her child who, in turn, has a meltdown in the middle of the street. “It’s a chain reaction.” Stress-reduction tools can help adults whose kids will likely learn to handle stress better by example.

Are you stressed?

Answering yes to three or more of the following statements shows you need to learn how to manage your stress:

• I feel nervous or anxious a lot.

• I take quick, shallow breaths.

• I suffer from depression and/or fatigue.

• I have chronic tension in parts of my body.

• I have ongoing health problems.