"‘Take two aspirins and call me in the morning’ would be a cold-hearted
response to a friend’s late-night report of fresh heartbreak, but it has a
solid basis in the research.”

Previous studies have shown that people experience feelings of romantic
rejection in the same way that they experience physical pain.

Research subjects given a simple non-prescription painkiller, like aspirin or
ibuprofen, were shown to handle feelings of rejection better than those
given a placebo.

And while most people recount break-ups and other painful experiences by
recalling events and speaking to friends, Prof Mischel believes that it is
important to view heartbreak from a distance.

“Common wisdom suggests that if we thoroughly revisit our negative experiences
to try to understand why they happened, we’ll eventually be able to move
on,” he said.

“However, new research is showing that some people only get worse by
continuing to brood and ruminate.

“Each time they recount the experience to themselves, their friends or their
therapist, they only become more depressed. Self-distancing, in contrast,
allows them to get a more objective view, without reactivating their pain,
and helps them get past the experience.”

The ‘self-distancing’ technique has been show to lower blood pressure caused
by emotional distress.

Prof Mischel developed the ‘Stanford Marshmallow Test’ which predicts whether
children will succeed in later life by inviting them to eat one marshmallow
right away, or wait 15 minutes and eat two.

The original studies were carried out in the 1960s and 1970s, and follow up
research has showed that those children who delayed gratification were far
more likely to do better in exams and have lower BMI.

Prof Mischel has collated his research in a new book, The Marshmallow Test;
Unverstanding Self-Control and How to Master It.