For some, Valentine's Day can be a painful reminder of singlehood. But instead of stressing about finding a new boyfriend or girlfriend for the social holiday, psychologists suggest focusing energy on all relationships as a whole.

"Studies have shown that the best romantic relationships start from good friendships," said Carolyn Cutrona, professor and department chair for the Psychology Department at Iowa State University.

According to an article in the Iowa State Daily, Cutrona said studies have shown since the 1970s that people who are not in close relationships are two to three times more likely to die earlier than those who are in close relationships.

Cutrona said loneliness is a leading cause of depression, substance abuse and eating disorders. Not being loved can take a toll on both a person's mental and physical health.

The study, "A picture's worth: Partner photographs reduce experimentally induced pain," was published in the Psychological Science journal. It showed when participants put their hands in ice water, less pain was reported when they were looking at a photograph of their partner.

Cutrona also said loneliness has been proven to cause weaker immune systems, especially in college students.

In the study "Loneliness, social network size, and immune response to influenza vaccination in college freshmen," published in the Health Psychology journal, students were injected with a cold virus. They then recorded the number of tissues students used throughout a week. The results showed that students in close relationships used less tissues and healed faster than those who were not in a relationship.

Cutrona said she doesn't know why college students have weaker immune systems, but she does know that they are the most vulnerable age group for a variety of psychological issues.

Mike Scheel, a University of Nebraska-Lincoln associate professor of educational psychology, said college students in general are more vulnerable because of the developmental phase they're going through.

"A lot of them are on their own for the first time," he said. "The challenges of being in college come from both in and out of the classroom."

Molly Sowers, a freshman pre-veterinary medicine major, said she feels better when she is single.

"I think most humans crave some sort of interaction though, especially when we're experiencing negative emotions, situations," Sowers said.

Sowers said interaction doesn't necessarily have to take place with a significant other.

Cutrona said people differ in how comfortable they are with relationships. She said there is research that shows people who avoid intimacy can benefit just as much as anyone else by having a supportive close relationship.

"Some people are much happier being by themselves," Scheel said. "It's a personality characteristic."

Ben Fischer, a freshman computer engineering major, said he is still waiting for the right girl. However, he said he feels best when he's helping someone else, regardless of his relationship status.

"Basically, do what makes you happy, not what society believes will make you happy," Fischer said.

Cutrona doesn't recommend temporary emotional satisfaction through engaging in the practice of "hooking up."

She said men and women have their hearts broken frequently when hookups mean different things to different people.

Nicole Lape, a freshman child, youth and family studies major, said it's important to be "happily single" before being "happily together."

"If you depend on another person for your happiness, what will happen to you if that person leaves or dies or cheats?" she asked.

Scheel said if people are dependent on the other person for all forms of happiness and can't first make themselves happy, that's a good indicator of not being in a healthy relationship.

Cutrona said what truly eliminates loneliness is making good friends.

"And the best romantic relationships start as friendships, so either way, you win," she said.

conordunn@

dailynebraskan.com